I've Been Replaced by Someone Younger and More Attractive

Long time, no blog. One could almost say that the Death Writer, or at least my blog, is officially dead. My last post, dated May 14th of last year, was about my toxic thyroid nodule and my plan to undergo radiation treatment. Well, that didn't happen. It was FAKE NEWS!!! I opted for surgery instead and lived to tell the tale!
See, it's not so bad! Simon's cat thinks otherwise.
Actually, here's a pic of me about two days post surgery with Sonya Reed's daughter. I drove her to the Mountain View Unit to meet her mom for the first time. If you've read Death Becomes Us, you know who I'm talking about.
Yeah, the wound is pretty frightening looking right there, but now it's neatly covered by my middle-aged neck wrinkles!
I now have a nifty scar on my neck that looks like I was in a knife fight with a very skilled plastic surgeon. Even better, I have half a thyroid that is functioning well. No medication for me (yet) and I avoided radiation. Surgery for the WIN!

Speaking of Death Becomes Us, I have some really exciting news. DBU is now available on Audible and iTunes! Many members of the book club I attend listen to their books and apparently this is now a thing. As a book preservationist (and someone who just loves the feel, look and smell of a book) I haven't jumped on this trend, but ACX made the process very simple. I didn't think anyone would want to listen to my monotone for 8 hours, so I held auditions. Since DBU is a very personal story, I had HUGE EXPECTATIONS. I didn't want Siri droning through my prose. After cringing at people's attempts at my neurotic voice, I was about to give up on the idea of going audio. But then...then Lisaun Whittingham auditioned. I knew after she read the first sentence that she was the one. Not only does she have a great smoky voice, she did a wonderful job interpreting the text. She's also gorgeous, not that that matters, but it's kind of cool to have someone "playing" me who is younger and much more attractive. She can be in the movie version. HELLO HOLLYWOOD!
She also has way better hair.

Well, my friends and random strangers, that's all the news that's fit to print. I'm glad you stopped by to read my blog post. The Death Writer blog meant so much to about 12 people, so thank you for stopping by to pay your final respects.

If you would like to purchase a copy of Death Becomes Us for yourself, your mom or that weird Uncle whose birthday is coming up, you can follow this link. You'll laugh, you'll cry and you might even learn a thing or two about biohazard cleaning, hospice, cognitive behavioral therapy or even death row.

Carpe Diem and all that.

P.S. If you would like to WIN a copy of Death Becomes Us, leave a comment on this post. Tell me the last book that you read or listened to. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!

A is for...

Well, it’s for a lot of things, actually.  There were three reasons I ventured into an exploration of death and much to my surprise and AMAZEMENT, they all start with the letter A.

It was an ACCIDENT.

I was in my first semester of graduate school at Goucher College trying to figure out my thesis topic.  I was sitting at home waiting for my mentor, Diana Hume George, to call my house.  As the tock clicked past our meeting time, I became anxious and called her number instead. (I’m not known for my patience.)

A funeral home answered.  I hung up.  I checked the number. I called again.  The same funeral home answered.  And the rest is history.

Maybe it’s because I suffered through most of my life with ridiculous social anxiety that death and its natural aftermath, grief, seemed particularly scary. In the past, if your mother died, I would run from you.  Not because I didn’t like or care for you, but because I didn’t know what to say or how to act and it made me feel incredibly uncomfortable.  I learned that I’m not alone.  Death is scary, but next to birth, it’s the most natural part of life.

At the beginning of this project, I was approaching 40, and I’d only lost a grandmother when I was a kid.  I feared that the latter part of my life was going to be filled with death and sadness.  Yes, both wait for me, but now I feel much better for facing my fear instead of pretending that the proverbial pink elephant doesn’t exist.

And it all lead to a BLOG and a BOOK, but more about that later…