Monday Mourning

First of all, I would like to thank everyone for their words of sympathy and kindness during the past week.  I may have spent several years exploring death but nothing prepared me for the emotional wallop of losing my mother-in-law. I really enjoyed being around her and I will miss her presence in my life.

Instead of an official eulogy written by one person, each member of her family wrote a few words about her and it was read during the visitation the night before her funeral.  Here's what I said...

I loved Lovina’s no nonsense demeanor, her colorful use of language and her appreciation of art, words and cats. Without judgment, she allowed her children and grandchildren to be who they were, however weird their behavior or hair style might look to others.  She loved to laugh and I enjoyed exchanging stories with her over coffee at her kitchen table or out on her back deck.  She was a hoot.

And she was.

Do you know what gave me comfort? It was simple, really. I had had the conversation with her about her end of life wishes before she died.  I remember sitting at her kitchen table and we talked about cremation and burial. (She was buried.)  Our conversation didn't freak her out, at least I didn't think it did, and I got a sense of what she wanted. Because of that

simple conversation

, I was able to relay to her children what I knew and hopefully that made their decisions a little easier.

Definitely not easy, though.

Death is difficult, but I have to say that having family, friends and food around helps.  I am so grateful that Lovina's nine siblings and some of their spouses came to spend time with us.  Also, I'm grateful to the multitudes of friends who gifted us with casseroles and sandwiches and chips and cookies.  I could barely think this week, so it was nice not to have to worry about grocery shopping or food.

Now, as the family members take off for their homes and we are left with just our thoughts, the real work of grieving will begin.

I've said it once, and I'll say it again, talk to people you love about your end of life wishes.  It's NEVER too early.  Have a wonderful week.  I will be posting sort of sporadically this month, but I'm sure you understand.

Pamela

Tuesday Movies: And yes, I said Movies

This past week I've been under the weather with a sore throat, a cough and all the fun congestive stuff that appears with the common cold.  While I haven't felt much like writing or trying to conjure up interviews, I did feel like going to the movies.  You have to understand that actually attending a movie in a darkened theater is sort of a rarity for me, so the fact that I was able to see two movies during one weekend is like a Christmas miracle.
What's even more of a miracle is that both of the movies I saw can be recommended to you due to their subject matter.  I don't want to spoil anything for you but, Lincoln does die. The movie Lincoln is really a political drama with a surprising amount of comedy thrown in.  I totally wanted to be Abraham Lincoln's friend after seeing this film.  It has both a happy/sad ending.  Happy in that the 13th Amendment was passed, but sad that the man behind it was assassinated.  There is some terrific acting in this film.  As my husband and I left the theater, I said, "Well, looks like Daniel Day Lewis is gonna get another Oscar."



That was until the next day when I saw this gem.  It's called The Sessions and it's based on a true story.  I don't want to give anything away, but it is one of the most heartwarming films I have seen in a long time.  Yes, it's all about sex, but let's face it, that's a pretty important subject.  This film handles the subject of sex with heart, humor and honesty.  I loved that the geriatric couple behind me were just as weepy as me when the credits rolled.

So, there you have it.  Two movies that are still in the theaters.  I'd love to hear your thoughts about them if you've seen them.  It is Thanksgiving week, one of the biggest weeks for movie going, so I encourage you to give both of these films a chance.

Have a great holiday!  I'm thankful that I don't have to cook and that I get to spend the day with my family.  A lot of food, a few too many drinks and a poker game will likely ensue.

What are you thankful for?